I’ve been hiding.
The truth is, things are going so great here.
D. has a drug problem.
He has had scoliosis for years, and coupled with enabling parents, poor medical insurance, and a major case of denial, he is now also a big opiad addict.
I know what you are thinking. Why did you marry him? I really don’t want to get into it all right now, mostly because I have been beating myself up for days. Weeks. Months.
The shit hit the fan on Passover, when we missed our first night’s Seder because he was getting more pills.
I brought up rehab, and he seemed okay with it. Of course, he also didn’t think I was serious.
We went and visited yesterday, and I made a boundry that said he had to go by Friday am, and he had to detox here at the rehab. I made his parents aware. They agreed. They cut his credit cards, weren’t going to give him a place to stay, etc etc.
His father is on the way here right now to take him. To the other detox place, that I do not support. No one cares what I say, and even though 1) I am the wife and 2) I am funding rehab, my boundaries are totally null and void in everyone’s eyes.
When they leave tomorrow, I am changing the locks and the garage door code.
If and when D shows up at rehab, I will be supportive.
Until then, I am in a really shitty place. (And yes, my mom is still sick. And I turned 30 last week. I try so hard to be positive, but it’s like Gd is challenging me. I am going to keep fighting. I don’t want to let this beat me.)
I need a hug.